Which eye?

kerry refuge

Do you ever wonder what you might have been in a previous life to deserve the one you have? I think I might have been a serial killer of kittens. No, hang on, that was this life when I had to euthanize Mrs. Stripes’ endless sick kittens. The veterinarian did it – I am not that creepy. Anyway, as you know, life has been a tad stressful recently with layoff and bereavement. Now I can add unexpected eye surgery to the mix.

We were getting all ready to choose an affordable health plan instead of taking Cobra in March and I have been seeing all my doctors in preparation. Today I had my yearly eye exam and paid extra to have that fancy new test that sees deep into the eye. Last year I was nonplussed to find out that I had very small cataracts in both eyes. I am in denial about middle-age… My assumption was that they would take years to develop into full blown cataracts.

Today the eye doctor said, “What can you see on the screen with your left eye?” “I can’t even see writing on the screen”, I replied. Even my doctor was shocked and astonished at how rapidly it had grown. At this stage I am essentially blind in one eye. We are very fortunate to live in the greater Houston area and I now have an appointment with an eminent eye surgeon next Monday. The plan is to have the cataract removed and a lens implanted. I knew it was serious because he held my hand.

Now we have to continue with Cobra, which we are fortunate to have, because this wonderful eye surgeon and my eye doctor are not covered on the new plans offered. Additionally, I went to my GP today because I thought I had shingles (without the rash). That could mean that the surgery would have to be delayed until my immune system is stronger. My incessant itching and upset tummy is a bit of a mystery, however, and despite a barrage of questions (and another doctor’s opinion), it doesn’t seem to be shingles.

Dr. Kerry thinks that my body is just under stress from recent travel across the Atlantic and everything else going on. Certainly my new pirate façade is not helping the stress! The weird thing is that you can’t see anything and that I have not noticed such a massive shift in vision, probably because I had mono-vision anyway. I have just realized that the lucky readers who have a universal health system won’t realize that Cobra is a government funding system that allows you to continue your work funded healthcare for 18 months after redundancy/layoff. You have to pay the full cost by yourself, however, instead of 20% or whatever we paid.

Dang it – one minute it is the menopause, then it’s the eyes! Last week I discussed with Teddy that I only want to live until 75 (an arbitrarily chosen time) but it looks like my parts are wearing out quicker than I thought. That was some black humor. I would feel better if I could drink a bottle of wine but I have to stick to a bland diet until my gastric system settles down. Think of me when you are having your Thai meal with some wine tonight!


53 thoughts on “Which eye?

  1. So sorry to hear about your cataract Kerry. You certainly are too young for it but I have another friend who had the op at 54 and she said it made a world of difference to her sight. Glad to hear you still have Cobra.

    Liben xx


    Liked by 1 person

  2. I hope your tummy settles down soon.. You will soon see what you have been missing with the surgery.. I wonder if you’ll have to adjust to having depth perception suddenly again.. So don’t get upset if things look strange when you open your eyes.. And maybe hold on to something or someone when you take your first steps.. And just know you have many well wishes from your readers even though we can’t be there with you.. hmmm.. Wouldn’t that be a hoot ! All your readers just show up at the hospital.. I do believe they’d call security 😂

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Ok, would it be vain to say for what it’s worth you have great skin? Going to need the name of your facial moisturizer. I’m sorry to hear of this. Seems like it happens right when many things are going wrong. Last year while both my husband and I were unemployed and 4 days after selecting “value insurance” bc ” we never get sick”, I had a boob itch and found a lump. I always say, if irony had a job, he would be a comedian. Will be saying a prayer for you. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thank you so much for the compliment and prayer. Mostly the skin is genetics but I actually have menopausal acne and I think the combo of sulphur wash and French Moisturizer helps with the skin. It is all called Avene – Amazon has it and Walgreens now. Hope the lump was just that.


      • I was diagnosed with Atypical Ductal Hyperplasia. Basically I have to take tamoxifen for the next 5 years because an ADH diagnosis gives you a 3 to 4 fold chance of breast cancer unless you take the tamoxifen. Hope I got my facts right there. I also had a lumpectomy to remove it. The hot mess gave me a TON of stories though for my book. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • That must be quite a worry to you, especially having to take Tamoxifen, as I know from friends it has some side effects. I have often wondered if I would do what Angelina Jolie did when she discovered she had the BRAC marker – she was brave. Good health to you and thank goodness we have more options these days.


    • I thought the same about your skin, Kerry. You look so young and fresh-faced. Soon you’ll be seeing the world with new eyes 🙂 Maybe try yoga and meditation, there’s nothing quite like it to get you centered, calm and focused. Plus it does great things for healing mind and body.
      Big hug and me and all your other readers are there with you in spirit, just don’t get a fright 😉

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Over the last 18 months my husband has had cataracts removed from both eyes, and implants fitted. His vision is now near perfect. Each time he was in hospital for only 6 hours. We are lucky to have an excellent eye specialist, even if he does look like an undertaker and have the personality of a lamp post. Hope the tummy sorts itself out soon. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Stress and anxiety play such a huge part in all of this. The physical body can only take so much and bits that are weakening will protest loudly. But it’s fixable. Your surgeon (or sturgeon which is what I orginally typed and would add comedy value and loads of mahusively expensive eggs but possibly not much actual help to your eyes) will sort you brilliantly and you won’t know yourself. My husband had both eyes done and whilst still bandaged and unable to see was served with divorce papers from my predecessor and had to have them read to him by his son. Assuming Teddy is not having an affair with an Australian and wanting to ‘find himself and start afresh’ I think you can be hopeful that you won’t have that added thoughtfully into the mix. Eye surgery is a very scary prospect but your baby blues will be SO happy when it’s done. In the meantime, lovely lady – this is the three. Redundancy, Bereavement, Surgery. No more for you. Sorry but that’s just the way it is 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    • LOL, Osyth. This comment should be a blog in it’s own right! I prefer sturgeon to surgeon and Teddy has an inexplicable dislike of Aussies, so I think I amsafe there. 🙂 Yes, I am going for the three bad things…

      Liked by 1 person

      • She’s English …. Frightfully bad form but in seriousness, as a feminist – not a man bashing bonkers bra burning ball basher just a girl who believes in equality and therefore didn’t think my ex husband had any more obligation to support me than I did him ( children – different issue) it beggars belief that she is pillaging half my husbands salary (after all other taxes) and took his house and half husband pension and yet us living with her paramour as a married couple. We struggle as they live the life of Riley …. Somethings gone a wed bit wrong methinks 😉

        Liked by 1 person

      • I have seen that happen recently with a good friend of mine here. Very sad. That said, in Texas, my friend who is English, can claim a pension from social security based on their previous marriage.

        Liked by 1 person

  6. Everyone commenting is making me laugh, although I came to seriously wish you well as you weather these health issues, Kerry. In my experience everything always happens at once. Getting through it all can be harrowing but when this is over you will have much better vision! Keeping you in my thoughts.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you so much, Leah. It was even worse at the airport – lots of comments such as, “can you see me now?” Curiously, I now can hardly see anything which must be psychological since I was able to see the computer last week. Once I got over the shock, I was fine and full of good humor again. I might pose in an eye patch and borrow next door’s parrot for a photo shoot. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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