I hope the title of this post intrigues you to read to the end. The story is all over the place but linked by DNA. Teddy, my husband, and I have always been competitive about our various ailments/oddities. That is why we are soul-mates… Recently, Ted had been complaining about a little growth on his pinkie finger. Long story short, the Italian American surgeon operated and came out to tell me what the prognosis was after the surgery. Unexpectedly, he told me it was a benign tumor and he had never seen anything like it. It seemed to be wrapped around the tendon. Then he told me that he had his DNA test and discovered (to his obvious Braveheart excitement) that he had a significant percentage of Scottish DNA. This was a red letter day for him – an unusual surgery on his Scottish compatriot. I had to gently let him know that the Scottish wife was really an Irish Hispanic mix. Hilariously, to me, he could not have looked more Italian but perhaps in his heart he was wearing blue Woad and tartan.
The growth went to pathology and a week later Teddy met with the Italian/Scots surgeon who excitedly told him that it was Dupruyen’s Contracture, a thickening of tendons in the hand that most commonly occurs in men around age 60 from Northern Europe. In Teddy’s case the thickening was on the upside of the finger when it is usually the other way around. When he came home we Googled it to find out that it is sometimes called Viking Finger. Can you imagine the fun I had with vulgar comments about my Viking’s Finger and where he could put it?? I have to admit that this month he has beat my giant cyst, Pumpkin, and the atrophied hoo-ha.
This led on to thinking what our DNA tests have done to us. Despite being 60% Irish, I cling defensively to my Conquistador heritage with a dash of Native American. I am deeply unhappy that Teddy has 4% more Iberian DNA than me. He is unhappy that he has no Native American ancestry despite having no American relatives. On many an occasion, a flirtatious Hispanic man has been so disappointed that my maiden name was Ortega. “But you look Scandinavian or Irish!” Our family was convinced that we were secretly Jewish but my DNA indicates otherwise…
So, I am at the airport this weekend and yet another Arabic man flirts with me (or is the other way around)? I would have guessed that he was a little older than me. First, he tells me I am beautiful. That elicited a smile and thank you. Then he asked me what age I was. I was surprised at the query but answered honestly that I will be 57 in a month. He looked me over and said, “I would have taken you for 51, maybe 52.” WTF!!!! Surely he could have told a little white lie and suggested 45? I will take any compliment but that was a bit ‘meh’. Then he asked me where I was from and I told him the usual spiel. You could see the disappointment on his face when I told him I had North African and Middle Eastern ancestry. “But you look Scandinavian”. I sighed and agreed that I had 1% Scandinavian ancestry. Now he was happy that he had flirted with one of ABBA’s kin.
I am beginning to come to terms that I am as Irish as a Mullingar heifer no matter how varied my DNA is. I sound Celtic, I look Irish and in America that is way more fascinating than all that Conquistador stuff. Isn’t it funny how life changes? At one time being Irish in America was as welcome as a Mexican immigrant. Well, I have both Irish and Mexican immigrant ancestors so to all the haters out there; I am raising one Viking Finger!
I believe that as more people get their DNA done we will better understand each other. So many of us here in America are so mixed in our DNA that we are truly part of the so called melting pot. I think that’s a good thing and the more that join us the better the taste. I only have to look at my own DNA results to see the journey that made me.
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You are so right and my post was just a silly, snarky one. I am proud of every percent of my DNA and so should we all be.
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I agree with you Kerry, if a guy that you are never going to see again is going to give you a complement, why not make it a STOATER of a complement.? Girls our age aren’t interested in the Truth!
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Bwahahaha! I wonder if our audience will understand a Stoater of a compliment but I do. You are so right that girls our age are not interested in the truth – I should have been the girl of his dreams, etc, etc! Love K xxx
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I had a DNA test a few months ago and was disappointed nothing pointed towards Italy or Asia but that’s another story! I’m relentlessly British but there’s a percentage of Finland and Russia so much to investigate. Since building my tree on Ancestry.com, I’ve found a cousin living down the road from me on the Isle of Wight and he came round for coffee yesterday morning. He was delightful, wise, kind and funny (much like me, really!) and I feel even more rooted here. DNA is fascinating!
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That’s wonderful! Teddy has Finnish/Russian too which explains his eyebrows!
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Viking finger? Never heard that term for Dupuytren’s contracture but dang I sure do like it! In fact, I’m gonna type that into my EHR tomorrow morning and see what it pulls up. 🙂
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I am sure you will make some older, Northern European man much happier if he knows he has a Viking Finger. 😁
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And yet it is not a code in the EHR. Bummer.
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My husband has DC as does his brother-in-law. Both are entirely un-credible as Vikings!!!! I so enjoyed this skitter through your DNA and absolutely snorted at that very under par compliment!
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Isn’t it amazing what we learn from Google? Sirens like us do not need under par compliments that makes one snort. LOL!
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Haha! And there’s another man who has no clue when it comes to compliments! Your lovely post made me smile, Kerry – a wonderful start for the day 😄
And I didn’t know that DC was called a Viking’s Finger – makes it sound rather attractive 😉
I think there might be French and Russian DNA running through me plus the half that’s Egyptian! That much at least came out when my aunt did some ancestry research but there’s no scientific proof for that yet.
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Your ancestry sounds very exotic! The grass is always greener…😁
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Hehe! Yes, it is, isn´t it? 😉
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Is that like Italian Sausage finger?😏
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Just a little less spicy…😁
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Haha! Good one!
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Great post! I really want to do the DNA test but too cheap to fork over $100. Also scared of what I’m going to find! Lol!!
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Sometimes it is just $75…😁 There is nothing bad to find out – it’s all exciting!
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True! Someday I’m going to pull the trigger.
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