Oxford dictionary definition of Catfishing – the process of luring someone into a relationship by means of a fictional online persona.

I chose WordPress as a gentle and safe forum to write on the Internet.  For the most part, I have been really happy with WordPress and my host service.  Like most of you, the Spam filter catches the most ridiculously fake ‘Bloggers’.  Last week, I had a short comment on my post and I responded, “thank you’.  Then there was a message asking if we could be friends…  I went back to his website which I quickly realized was full of other people’s posts.  Then I looked at his profile and that’s when the alarm bells rang.  He was a 9 (out of 10); graying hair, big brown eyes in his mid-50s, I would guess.  Jeffery hailed from North Carolina, a single Dad of two sons and a marine engineer.

I don’t believe in false modesty – I am reasonably attractive lady for my age.  Especially at twilight with a glass of wine…  Over the years on WordPress, I have had some suitors, for want of a better word.  Usually, it’s just harmless flirting and I am happy to indulge.  My favorite was an older gentleman from a remote Pacific Island whose wife had died and he had 10 children.  I gently let him down but noted that he was handsome and I don’t have any children!  Jeffery provoked my curiosity and I searched for him on LinkedIn with no success.  Then I checked out his URL.  What a surprise – it was from Africa.

On that note, I have to share my dirty little secret – I am addicted to terrible reality shows where you marry someone inappropriate from overseas.  Inevitably, it very rarely works out with some surprising exceptions.  I think my obsession started in Africa when we lived in Cairo.  Every so often we had to go to a terrifying, massive government building called the Mugamma.  The staff reminded me of the Department of Motor Vehicles, in the US.  Teddy’s company paid for someone, fluent in Arabic, to accompany us and navigate the stressful world of visas.  Despite this, I always needed to see my psychologist after the dreaded trip.

There were lines of refugees from every part of Africa, often wearing national dress, and my heart went out to them.  I always felt that Cairo was very generous to refugees and guests, since it is not a rich country.  Then there was the line for anyone getting married.  My friend from Ukraine married her  beau from New Zealand while we were there.  I was 42 when we moved there and I was fascinated by women in their late 50’s desperately pleading with the soulless staff to be allowed to marry a much younger Egyptian man.  Did they really think they were in love with them?

I knew quite a few European women who married Egyptian men and some were genuine love matches.  Very few survived the challenge of a completely different culture.  There was one older Scottish lady who married a younger man who then took all her money out of her control.  She was left with very few options; putting up with the situation or returning to Scotland penniless, living on welfare.  I am not even sure that there was any malice involved – it was normal for a husband to have full control of the family finances.

Back to my Catfisher – was it male or female?  It was a pretty complicated scam and fraudulent.  After their request to be friends, I responded, “Of course!  I would be happy for you to join my group of WordPress friends.”  The lack of response spoke volumes and I blocked him. Life is really hard right now, especially in third world countries, so it didn’t surprise me that someone would want to strip me of my American dollars.  Be careful of the sharks out there.  Do you think Jeffery would still be interested in me if he saw this photo of me catfishing or more correctly rescuing catfish? Yes, I am thigh deep in a murky lake with water moccasins and alligators.

PS.  I was going through a mental health crisis which explains the bald head.  Read the original blog here – Kerry and the Catfish.

73 thoughts on “Catfishing

  1. You should ask Jeffrey if he would like to fund your cancer treatment or even send over some food parcels since you have to catch what you eat in the local pond. You are so cheery in this picture because you are delighted to find a good friend such as him on the internet.

    Liked by 10 people

  2. Well, my dear, you rock baldness! ❤ Thank goodness I read this. A Nigerian princess reached out to me recently, and if I forward her $5,000.00 US, she'd reward me with one million dollars. But, now I'm a tad bit suspicious. 😉

    Liked by 10 people

  3. Haha, well done Kerry. You’d be a good catch but there must be a lot of desperate or lonely people out there, as well as the many hoping for a bite from anyone with money to spare. Romance frauds are on the increase and the lonely and/or widowed are often easy prey.

    Liked by 9 people

  4. I receive around 50 emails daily in work from people who want to give me millions of dollars, roubles whatever.
    Spam city out there. Think you should reply asking him to support your treatment as Katherine says🤣
    I quite like the buzz cut. It suits you but looking for catfish, in a lake with alligators. Takes it to a whole new level. Not sure the moccasins will offer much protection.
    Take care x

    Liked by 8 people

  5. You still rock a bald head and cooler with the temps you get there. My problem is I had 3 stalkers All were women. Quite sexually verbal. Even when i told them the truth it seem they wanted to pursue me more. That is why I went on privacy. I recently after a couple of years took privacy off. Hope you are having and excellent and peaceful day. ❤

    Liked by 5 people

  6. I don’t get as many as I used to. My emails get a few young women….very young women who think me desirable…..haven’t seen a photo!!! One young woman offered to show me feet either with stockings or just bare feet with painted toenails. I told her that she should aim higher in life 😂

    Liked by 5 people

  7. Spam emails can be annoying. Worse, it can include scammy offers that can cost you time and money. If only we didn’t have to deal with unwanted bulk emails from unknown sources here on WordPress! I usually try to keep my device’s security updated and change my preset passwords, but they still keep on coming. I hope your summer is going well 🙂 Aiva xx

    Liked by 5 people

    • I just treat Spam as part of life now – like fleas or scabies…😉 My summer is unbearably hot but a cold front is coming in which should reduce the temperature to 95 F. Have a lovely weekend, Aiva. K x

      Liked by 2 people

  8. Well first off you look fabulous with a low hair cut! And I am so amused by women that don’t realize when a young man or old man is catfishing them. I’m hooked on reality shows about catfishing.

    Liked by 4 people

  9. I get many requests on Linkedin from 30 year old stunning woman (profile pictures) who seem to be attracted to a 52 year old greying thinning bloke! I google their photo in a reverse image look up to find out where the photo was stolen from! Maybe one day one of them might turn out to be real hahah

    Liked by 3 people

  10. Anyways such cases of marrying older women for their money is more over here in Africa especially Nigeria. Just because of your few dollars as you said😊

    I hope my fellow African men can see this post.

    Liked by 3 people

  11. I enjoy messing with cat fishing scammers. I tell them that I’m a princess from Africa and that I’ll send them a million dollars if they can wire transfer me $1000.00 to help me travel back home from abroad. It’s so much fun! 🤪

    Liked by 3 people

  12. Wow such a great topic to write about. As for me, I am aware of Cat fishing dangers thus it is key to open your eyes wide to avoid problems in marriage though I am not married but I see how cat fishing hurts the process of a genuine relationship

    Liked by 2 people

  13. A very interesting story you’ve shared. It isn’t easy finding love, especially when it’s done over the internet. It’s like fishing blind. You catch all sorts of things- snakes, frogs and some fish you don’t really like. It’s usually by chance you catch what you really seek.

    Liked by 2 people

  14. I never put my photo online – so never had any of these catfishing scammers. Had quite a few scammers on my website, though, pretending they want to buy a painting for the wife. They have a certain style of writing , It’s easy to spot them😂.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. I had to chuckle about those shows you had discussed, my wife is into “ real housewives of Orange County “ lol
    All I hear in the other room is yelling and bleeps !!!
    Praying for peace as you go through your crisis…

    Liked by 1 person

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